The Beer Wench

For shits and giggles, I decided to compile a list of my personal favorite quotes relating to beer! Cheers!

“Beer deserves to be treated as a civilized drink; it may even have been the cause of civilization.” -Michael Jackson, The Beer Hunter

“I’ve said it before and no doubt I’ll say it again: Beer is as dignified and sophisticated a beverage as any other, and in and of itself, does not make you fat or lazy or stupid or boorish. And stereotypes suck.” Stephen Beaumont, World of Beer

“Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.” -Kaiser Welhelm

“I would give all my fame for a pot of ale, and safety.” -Shakespeare, King Henry V

“I work until beer o’clock.” -Stephen King

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” -Benjamin Franklin … OKAY so Ben Franklin did not actually utter this phrase. The myth is debunked here. But I like the quote so it shall stay.

“They who drink beer will think beer.” -Washington Irving

“He was a wise man who invented beer.” -Plato

“I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer.” -Abraham Lincoln

“Quaintest thoughts, queerest fancies come to life and fade away. What care I how time advances; I am drinking ale today.” -Edgar Allen Poe

“I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.” -Homer Simpson

“Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed - Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn’t drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, ‘It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.’” -Deep Thought, Jack Handy

And of course … LA CREME DE LA CREME …

“Well ya see, Norm, it’s like this… A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.” -Cliff Clavin, of Cheers