Dear Molson Coors,

I hate you.

Sincerely,

The Wench

Frankly, I don’t even know where to begin.

Two weeks ago, Molson Coors announced the release of a new line of beers specifically targeted towards women — a concept that not only angers and disgusts me, but is downright offensive.

I first got wind of the rumored “clear beer” last year, and most definitely aired my grievances then (read: BEER WARS: The Female Edition). But I had not heard anything more on the subject until recently. And as if clear beer wasn’t bad enough… Molson Coors also announced the launch of both a pink and yellow hued beer enhanced with what I assume is artificial flavoring.

Thankfully, this abomination of a product is only being released in the U.K. Those poor Brits…

According to research done by the marketing lackeys of Molson Coors, only 17% of women in the UK drink beer (as compared to 25% in the U.S.). Honestly, I don’t know much about the U.K. craft beer scene, aside from what Melissa Cole and Mark Dredge have told me. But something tells me that the lack of women drinking beer is a deeper issue than Molson Coors is willing to admit.

Perhaps the reason why more women drink beer in the U.S. is because our craft beer industry is twice, maybe 3 times larger and more extensive than the U.K.’s. Per capita, the U.S. has more craft breweries. And craft breweries make up a much larger percentage (albeit an extremely small percentage) of overall market share in the U.S.

So what does this mean? It means the average U.K. citizen is not exposed or does not have access to as much delicious flavorful beer as the U.S. Don’t get me wrong, the U.K. boasts a lot of really amazing and talented craft breweries. But from what I understand, corporate beer dominates the market place. And let’s face it, if my options were limited to corporate swill, I probably wouldn’t drink beer either.

Using probability theory and sheer common sense, one might be able to logically deduce a correlation between the fact that the U.S. has a larger craft beer market and a higher percentage of women beer drinkers. My theory is that, despite what Molson Coors research has concluded, women in fact prefer more flavorful, artisan-crafted beverages. This is also because I also believe that women, on average, have better palates than men. But, don’t just take my word for it…

According to research done at Yale University in the early 90′s, women, on average, possess more tastebuds than men. Linda Bartoshuk, professor of otolaryngology and psychology at Yale, is one of the leading scientists researching genetic variation in the ability to taste. She is the very scientist that coined the term “super taster,” which refers to those born with extra taste receptors. According to her research, 25% of the population are supertasters, 25% are nontasters and 50% are tasters. For American Caucasians, about 35% of women and only 15% of men are supertasters.

And the buck doesn’t stop at tasting. Marcia Pelchat, a sensory psychologist specializing in food and beverage selections at the Monell Chemical Senses Center, has been credited with concluding that, on average, women have a better sense of smell than men. And according to Marcia, both taste and smell contribute to the perception of flavor, which gives a stronger argument in favor of women being better tasters than men.

And researchers aren’t the only people acknowledging this fact. Even the big beer guys are catching on…

Last year, SABMiller announced that 30% of its 1,000 advanced-level tasters are female — a number that has roughly quadrupled in 10 years. Interestingly enough, SABMiller says its empirical evidence shows that females are the superior sex when it comes to detecting such undesirable chemicals such as 3-methyl-2-butene-1-thiol (which is responsible for skunk flavors in beer).

So hypothetically, if women are more sensitive to smell and better tasters than men, doesn’t it seem like they would desire more aromatics and flavor in beer? And conversely, if they are, in fact, more sensitive to smell and taste, they would be more capable of detecting off-flavors and flaws in beer, which means they have a higher chance of being turned off from beers (like adjunct lagers) that are characteristically flawed. Right?

As for the new Molson Coors product, let us discuss just how asinine and horrendous it truly is…

“The 4% ABV beer is lightly sparkling and finely filtered with a delicious, fresh taste. Animée will be available in three variants: clear filtered , crisp rosé and zesty lemon.” Let us get this straight. Molson Coors is blatantly implying that women have inferior palates. Wow. What a fucking smack in the face.

Not only did Molson Coors completely remove any sort of semblance of beer from the product, they also felt the need to spike it with artificial flavors and colors. It truly makes me want to scream and cry at the same time. This must be some sick and cruel joke.

And to add insult to injury. The rose flavor is fucking pink. I fucking hate pink. And when I saw the label with the pink hops, I threw up in my mouth. Twice.

Let us review what we have learned today: Molson Coors did some research and found that only 17% of women in the U.K. drink beer. Yale research says that women are more likely to be supertasters. Research also shows that women possess a more sensitive sense of smell. SABMiller is continuing to hire more women tasters because they acknowledge the aforementioned. Yet, Molson Coors thinks that instead of creating a more flavorful and aromatic beer to attract more women, the best plan was to completely strip beer of all of its wonderful qualities and add even more adjuncts and artificiality.

As much as I would love to speak on the behalf of all women out there, I can only speak for myself. Personally, I was very much NOT a beer drinker until I discovered craft beer. When I wanted to get drunk in college, I usually opted for disgusting mixed drinks and boxed wine over yellow fizzy mass-produced beer. It wasn’t until I started to study for sommelier certification when I was 22 that I really began to respect an appreciate the complexities and nuances in alcohol. But it wasn’t until I was exposed to the amazing world of craft beer, that I became a craft beer drinker. And now look at me….

In conclusion, being both a soapbox craft beer evangelist and feminist, there is no way in hell that I will advocate or support this product. In fact, I hope that the concept fails miserably and that Molson Coors loses big money in the process. And while I watch them crash and burn, I will raise a pint of craft beer in the mist of their ashes and declare with conviction… “I AM A CRAFT BEER DRINKER”.

For more information on this subject, check out Melissa Cole’s take on Animee.

Judging by the title of this blog post, one can correctly assume that The Wench is about to start a, somewhat alcohol induced, rant of the, always expected, very bitchy nature.

A few people in my close personal circle have heard my incessant complaints about this subject for years, but I have held my tongue (and my typing fingers) on this topic for entirely way too long.

Many things in this world piss me off, but nothing frustrates me quite like the hypocrisies with craft beer in the restaurant industry.

You see, my roots in craft beer originated in the restaurant industry. Like many lost souls who find themselves working in restaurants, I graduated college with no clear goals and aspirations. And when in doubt, wait tables… right? Unlike many front of the house employees, I developed a sincere interest for culinary techniques and the artistry behind cooking. But like most restaurant employees, I developed quite a liking of booze. However, my constant pursuit for flavor stimulation in the kitchen carried over into my beverage habits, and I began to appreciate and study the nuances of wine.

It wasn’t until I developed a love and understand of wine, that I began to develop respect for alcohol. But this isn’t a sap story about my love for wine… so let us move on.

My enthusiasm, knowledge and passion for cooking, serving, and wine ultimately landed me a job as a restaurant manager — a job that changed my life completely. The owners of my restaurant put me in charge of all things beverage — which was cool since I was studying for my sommelier certification and I loved coffee and tea. The hard part was the beer. Before then, I never drank beer. Even in college I preferred hard spirits and if I did drink beer, it was shitty-ass corporate beer, brewed with adjunct ingredients, that I purely used as a vehicle for drunkenness and debauchery.

The owners of my restaurant were focused on sustainability and making healthy choices that positively impacted the planet. One such environmentally conscientious decision was to only offer craft beer. No mass-produced yellow fizzy beers for us. Only beers brewed from the highest quality ingredients by true artists of the craft. And it was here that I learned that, not only was craft beer superior to mass-produced beer, it deserved a righteous place on the dinner table, along side all of the other fine beverages — especially, wine.

It took many, many years of denial and protestation before I was finally able to admit that beer was, in fact, the finest beverage of them all. And don’t get me wrong, I live in Napa for a reason. I drink wine almost every day of my life. I love my wino friends, wine bloggers, wine makers… but at the end of the day I am fully confident when I say…

the complexities and nuances in craft beer surpass those in wine.

And this brings us to the main topic of discussion: craft beer & the restaurant hypocrisy.

Now, there are several things about the restaurant industry that piss me off, in regards to craft beer. But my greatest pet peeves are:

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Great Restaurants with Sub-Par (or non-existent) Craft Beer Menus

I live in Napa Valley, hypothetically the home to some of the most discerning palates in the world, and yet I am constantly disappointed, if not appalled, by the lack of craft beer on the menus of our most prestigious restaurants. For most, the beer menu is an afterthought — if even a thought at all. They see beer as a blue-collar beverage, barely worthy of gracing their menu. But, they acknowledge that they need to carry it, even though it has the lowest profit margin, and end up selecting sub-par mass-produced non-craft beers.

The hypocrisy?

These restaurants fly in fresh fish, over-night. These restaurants source ingredients from only the best, most coveted, local producers. These restaurants will pay an arm and a leg for their food ingredients, because they want to provide the most fresh, highest quality and amazing tasting ingredients possible.

And it doesn’t stop there.

The wine lists are extraordinary, the liquors are top shelf. And the beer?

The beer lists are uninspired, unoriginal, underwhelming and extremely disappointing.

Nothing, and I mean nothing, turns me off more that going to a prestigious restaurant with an acclaimed executive chef, with one of the most amazing menus and wine lists in the world… and witnessing them serve mass-produced corporate beer.

When I lived in Florida, I worked at a pretty fancy corporate wine concept. The whole place was run like a tight ship. Only the freshest, perfectly plated food made it to the guests. Our wine list was spectacular. We had super high-end spirits. But the beer? Only one beer on the menu was craft, and even that beer was the best seller of the largest craft beer producer. The sad part about the entire company was that the beverage director was one of the ONLY Master Sommeliers in the world. We are talking about a man that has a better palate than 99.9% of the world. I can throw his name around the wine industry and most know of him, if not know him personally.

I cannot complain, though, for working under him. His server training program was of the utmost level. When it came to wine studies, I had everything at my disposal. My company paid for my Certified Specialist of Wine training and certification. It also offered to pay for the sommelier test, which although I never took, is pretty expensive. They wanted us to excel and were prepared to give us all the tools necessary to make it happen.

One day, during a race that our restaurant sponsored and I volunteered to help with, I approached my Master Sommelier and addressed this very issue, my biggest frustration, with him. His, oddly expected, response was that the people who would come to our restaurant and drink beer would not be interested in fine craft beer. In other words, our restaurant was a fine dining establishment and “wine bar” with a sophisticated clientele who appreciated wine, and anyone who would dare so much as drink beer, well they were blue-collared and only liked yellow fizzy mass-produced swill.

To this day, I love that man. And he was a big supporter of me after I left. But, I cannot deny my sincere disappointment.

It is not cool, no matter how much you argue the case, for a Master Sommelier, a man with one of the most amazing and most discerning palates in the world, to neglect and dismiss craft beer.

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Untrained, Uneducated Staff

Along with local, sustainable, and artisan, craft beer has become a buzz word and growing trend across the world. And although few people outside of the very small niche market actually know what the term craft beer actually constitutes, many restaurants have attempted to embrace the trend, incorporating craft beers into beverage menus.

So you got the memo that craft beer is “hot” and you went to your distributors and ordered some buzz craft beer brands and put them on your menu. And now you think you are hip and cool and trendy. Heck, you might think that you are innovative because you were the first person in your town to do it.

I see it in Napa, I see it in San Francisco, I have witnessed it in Chicago, L.A., NYC and pretty much every big city in the U.S. A great beer list is virtually useless if you and your staff are uneducated.

Now, I am not insisting that all front of the house restaurant employees develop an extensive understanding of the brewing process and the entire spectrum of ingredients and flavors in beer. It is necessary, however, to understand the basic flavor profile and a few details about the brewery for each of the beers on your menu.

Sales & Marketing 101: If you want to sell a product, you have to know your product.

The hypocrisy?

I have seen several restaurants go to extensive lengths to train employees on food menus and wine lists. Heck, I worked for a restaurant that used to test us on every menu change.  We had written exams that required us to list every single ingredient in every single dish, every single house cocktail as well as rattle off tasting notes for all the wines. But beer? Forget about it. Beer is typically the LAST priority, and using the word priority is a stretch, on most restaurant menus.

Now, I don’t expect bartenders and servers to know more about beer than me — after all, craft beer is my career, greatest passion and my raison d’etre. I do expect, however, for the person serving me to know details about the beer that they are serving. And I don’t mean being able to tell me “yeah, it’s good.” Where is the beer made? What is the style? What are the characteristics of that style? Can you give me the basic flavor profile? And even better, what food on the menu do you recommend pairing with this beer? And even better than that, why do you recommend pairing this beer with that dish?

Sounds easy, right? Well, it is. And witnessing restaurants neglect or refuse to train and educate staff on craft beer really REALLY irks me because 1. it is lazy and 2. it is disrespectful to the craft beer industry.

Would you order a cocktail from a bartender who doesn’t know the difference between a Cosmopolitan and a Manhattan? Me neither….

The greatest barrier to converting people to craft beer is LACK OF EDUCATION. Most consumers are not educated on craft beer, but most beer drinkers have potential to be converted. Education = confidence + empowerment. And a confident and empowered consumers = sales.

If you work in a restaurant that sells craft beer and has an untrained staff, but you do not know where to begin when it comes to education — PLEASE do not hesitate in contacting me. I have several tools at my disposal, as well as have developed (and currently revising) an extensive server training program.

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Improper Glassware & Serving Temperature

“Glassware is key nowadays when it comes to beer. It’s not imperative, but would you drink wine out of the bottle? No, you’re going to pour in it a glass. The same treatment and respect should be done for your craft beer. When you do that, you get the opportunity to have full enhancement of the aroma and the flavors in that beer.” — Julia Herz, Brewer’s Association

Many regions and varietals of wine require special glassware designed to enhance the wine experience. This is also true for beer, except the range of beer glasses is way more extensive than wine glasses. In Belgium, virtually every beer produced has its own glass. In wine talk, this would be the equivalent of each and every single winery in France developing its own glass for each of its wines.

I cannot express my pure and utter frustration upon being served a craft beer in an improper glass. The biggest examples of improper glassware presentation = Imperial styles in pint glasses and High-gravity Belgian beers in pints glasses. Pint glasses, in most situations, are not the appropriate or preferred vessel, especially with beers boasting high levels of alcohol and extremely complex flavor profiles.

Carrying all the proper glassware can be very daunting, expensive and time consuming. For the most part, two or three different styles should suffice for most craft beer menus, unless of course you specialize in Belgian styles. The basic glassware types, with recommended beer styles, can be found here at CraftBeer.com.

As with wine, craft beer presentation requires a properly cleaned glass.  Glassware must be completely free of oils, soap residue, and pretty much all foreign materials. Bottom-line: beer must be poured into SPOTLESS glassware. (To learn how to properly clean glassware, check out this guide from the Brewers Association.)

Sure, you can pour the beer behind the counter so that I cannot see whether or not the glass was clean. But the beer will not lie, and I will find out. Beer poured into a properly clean glass forms a proper head and creates residual lacing as the beer is consumed. There are several ways to test for a clean glass. The Brewers Association details them here.

“Temperature is actually something that many beers need to scream loud and clear about. Because if you listen to your beer, it doesn’t want to be served totally cold. Most beers, beyond light American Lager and Pilsners, want to be served warmer at cellar temperatures.” — Julia Herz, Brewer’s Association

The factor in beer presentation that is almost always neglected is beer temperature. Would you serve a Sauvignon Blanc warm or a big Napa Valley Cabernet at white wine temperatures? I don’t think so. As with wine, not all beer is created equal. If you are a restaurant that has chosen to carry special styles that require service at special temperatures, you need to recognize and honor temperature ranges.

Despite what the average beer consumer, brainwashed by admen and mega-corporation ad campaigns, think — most beer should not be served ice cold. Why would people be brainwashed into thinking this? Because bad beer tastes much better ice cold. Your taste receptors are numbed by the cold and you actually can’t get a good impression of the flavors in that beer. RateBeer.com has an excellent and comprehensive guide for proper beer serving temperatures.

Now don’t even get me started on “chilled” glassware. Unless you are serving a mass-produced light lager made with adjunct ingredients, chilled glassware is not only unnecessary, but undesirable. Not only is it an unnecessary step in beer service, it can always adversely impede the beer drinking experience. For more on this topic, visit the section on Glassware Temperature from the Brewers Association.

Not to mention, chilling glassware is the biggest cop-out when it comes to cleaning glassware.

And last but not least, my final grievance of today (and trust me, this is not all of them…)

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Improper Pouring and Poor Presentation of Craft Beer

Case Study #1: To date, I’ve had two rather disappointing experiences with beer service at a new, super trendy downtown Napa Valley waterfront establishment owned by a pretty well-known Food Network star chef (how is that for subtly?). The service there is impeccable and the food is top notch. The draft beer, although partially craft, is uninspired and typical of the area. The bottle list seems to rotate a bit more, so they have that going for them

One night I decided to order a Belgian beer in the bottle. First mistake: the female behind the bar poured it into a pint glass, almost always the improper glass for any beer from Belgium. The second mistake she made was to treat it like wine. Instead of pouring a full glass of beer, pouring straight down towards the end, allowing the CO2 to release from the beer and give it a nice foamy head… she opted to tilt the beer, slowly pouring out 1/3 of it, carefully making sure not to agitate it and allow a head to build. She placed the glass and the partially poured beer in front of me.

First of all, if you are only going to partially pour beer, then you better give me a smaller glass. Second of all, WTF. I took the bottle and I proceeded to finish it off with a nice hard pour, creating a desired amount of head.

Case Study #2: I was excited to learn that a recently Michelin-rated (but not starred) restaurant in downtown Napa had Orval, quite possibly my favorite beer in the world. And not only did it have the beer, but it had the proper glassware. Call me naive, call me assuming, but I figured that a place which not only carried ORval, but it’s proper glass, would also know how to make the proper pour.

Sadly, my assumptions were proven wrong.

For those unfamiliar with the wiles of Orval, it is a bottle-conditioned Trappist ale that gets spiked with brettanomyces (a wild yeast strand) at bottling. The bottle is specially designed with a “yeast catcher” in the neck, which prevents yeast from being poured into the glass. Orval requires a very attentive pour, which allows it to develop a large, billowy almost meringue like peak of foam which raises above the glass (but does not flow over). This pour is easily to obtain with practice, and should not intimidate anyone. ‘

Now, I can handle a sub-par pour, but what I will not stand for is the yeast to be poured into the glass, which is exactly what to obviously untrained server did. The experience almost turned me into a beer nazi. I wanted to strip them the right of serving Orval until they learned how to give it the respect it deserves.

If there is one lesson that should be taken away from this experience, it is DO NOT POUR YEAST FROM BOTTLE-CONDITIONED BEERS INTO THE GLASS WITH THE BEER. And if you are curious to know what happens when you do so, specifically with Orval, feel free to watch my video tasting with Orval where I discover first-hand just what yeast does to the flavor…

If there is one things, just one thing, on this entire list of grievances that I will encourage all restaurants to learn above all else — it is how to properly pour beer. Everything else is just gravy on the cake. A great resource is, once again, the Brewers Association.

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I wish I could say that the rant ends here, unfortunately this is only the tip of the iceberg. However, have faith in knowing that these grievances were not done in vain and that I have set out on a personal mission to change the current state of craft beer in the restaurant industry. Stay tuned.

After a emotionally charged and mentally challenging week in the beer blogging realm, my psychological state of mind was, needless to say, a bit out of sorts. I forced to question the validity and relevance of my own personal brand and blog as well as reevaluate my purpose and my place in the industry.

WHY DO I BLOG ABOUT CRAFT BEER?

Why have I sacrificed stability any semblance of a normal life to advocate and promote craft beer? Why have I sacrificed my reputation in order to fight for what I believe in?

Why have I dedicated my life to being a craft beer evangelist? The answer is simple.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” — Mahatma Gandhi.

This is why I write. This is why I advocate. This is why I live and breathe for craft beer. If, through my writing and my evangelism, I can impact the industry, ignite a revolution, and inspire and create change, my mission has been successful.

As sappy as it may sound, I advocate out of unconditional love and passion for craft beer. I love the people. I love the community. And I love the beer.

I must admit that sometimes I ask myself: Is it really worth it? After all, I make negative money running my site. Why do I spend valuable hours promoting and advocating beer, when I should be focused on finding a job? Why do I endure all the daggers, the mud-slinging, and the insults?

This morning, I was reminded WHY I do it.

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Hi Ashley! My name is Terrence Jackson, and I recently started my own blog called EleventyBeers, and I have you to thank for me finally having the inspiration to do so. I mean, it is my love for craft beer that ultimately fueled my desire, but I would never have decided to actually do it if I wasn’t a frequent reader of your site. Your blog truly sets my heart on fire for sharing the craft beer gospel, and I hope that I can touch the hearts and minds of others as you have touched mine. Thanks so much for everything you do!

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It is humbling moments like these that ground me and bring me back to my center. This is why I do what I do. I don’t do it for fame or fortune. I am not a brewer. I don’t work for a brewery (unfortunately). I cannot make an impact on the industry from that aspect of the industry. But you know what I do have? A voice. A strong and forceful voice, at that. And one that is definitely not the most popular. But, I am not focused on being loved and adored, or even liked. I want to make a difference.

The advancement and advocacy of craft beer has become my mission in life. Some of you might not agree with my personal opinions, my choices, and my particular approach to craft beer advocacy.

Since birth, my mother has drilled this quote into my head: “This above all, to thine ownself be true.”– Shakespeare.

Love me. Hate me. Feel indifference towards me. Question my validity, question my place and value in the industry. Criticize me and insult me.

But, NEVER question my intentions or my integrity or challenge my passion and love for craft beer.

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On a final note:

Thank you to Terrence Jackson for reminding my why I do what I do in the first place. You have become an inspiration to me as well, and I look forward to following your adventures. Best of luck with your new beer blog. Never stop living the dream, and remember this (above all): “to thine ownself be true.”

If you are a self-respecting woman and, after reading this post, you still want to drink corporate beer. Well, then. I don’t know what to think.

Today I read a post entitled: 26 Highly Suggestive Girl Beer Ads.

The author notes: “Coming up with a marketing campaign for adult beverages isn’t very hard, yet they’re almost always successful when simple rules are followed. One approach, Suggestive girl ads. They sell, really well. Here is a collection of ads from around that (for at least guys) will surely get a response in the brain, if not elsewhere…Enjoy.”

Each and every single one of the 26 advertisements objectifies women in one way or another, some being more appalling than others.Some of them made me want to vomit. Literally.

By now most of you should know that it does not take much to for my feminist side to get fired up. It is moments like these where I really believe that our progressive society is actually regressing. It frustrates me to no end to think of all the people that have fought long and hard for woman’s rights and equality, just to have them objectified by mega corporations and admen.

Part of me wonders what almost completely naked women have to do with beer sales. But then I realize, when your actual product sucks, you have to find other methods to sell it. And unfortunately, in today’s sad pathetic world, sex sells.

The difference between craft beer and corporate beer is that the actual beer sells itself. Craft beer does not need to employ the help of huge ad agencies to develop multi-million dollar ad campaigns. Craft beer does not need to objectify women and sell sex in order to sell beer. The beer speaks for itself, naked women do not.

I suppose a lot can be said for people who drink craft beer over corporate beer. Obviously, they care about WHO makes their beer, WHERE the beer comes from, and WHAT goes into their beer. They will not settle for the lowest common denominator. They refuse to be victims of marketing ploys and ad campaigns. And, most importantly, they refuse to support companies that objectify women.

I want to raise a toast to all the pink boot wearing women in the craft beer industry who are brave enough to defy female standards and work in a male-dominated industry. I want to raise a toast to all the men in the industry who support woman’s rights and refuse to stoop to the level of mega-corporations and admen. I want to raise a toast to all the people in the world who choose to support craft beer in lieu of sub-par beers made with adjuncts that use ad campaigns that objectify women.

And if you are the kind of person that likes to sit down with a corporate beer from time to time, I encourage you to re-think your purchasing behaviors and beverage choices. Especially, if you are within 100 feet of The Wench. Trust me on this, you do not want to feel my wrath.

Cheers!

There are many reasons why I don’t read women’s lifestyle magazines. Most of them insult me in some sort of fashion as well as frustrate me to no end. Same goes for a lot of the men’s lifestyle magazines. The random studies and articles completely perplex me. For someone who studied statistics and social epidemiology, the methods of research and how they analyze and determine the results make no sense at all.

In a recent internet-based article, Men’sHealth made the outlandish claim that “Americans have developed a severe drinking problem.” And by drinking problem, they are not referring to alcohol abuse. Oh no. Men’sHealth is lashing out on beverages across the entire spectrum — from waters, to sodas, to beers. The argument is that Americans consume a damaging amount of “empty calories” from what Men’sHealth considers to be unhealthy beverages.

The article details a list of the 20 Worst Drinks in America. It appears that the criteria that use to define “worst drinks” is caloric content, grams of carbohydrates, grams of sugar and alcohol content (if relevant). The organizations and method in the madness behind the list is perplexing. Whereas it is completely obvious that a 2,000 calorie milkshake and drinks produced from artificial flavors and colors with obscene amounts of additive and sugars are not the healthiest beverages on the planet, the argument against craft beer is just plain ludicrous.

Men’sHealth has declared Sierra Nevada’s Big Foot the Worst Beer and Sam Adam’s Light Lager the Worst Light Beer. These allegations are farce. Both of these beers are artisanly crafted fine beverages, brewer with quality NATURAL ingredients. To put them in the same category as artificial sodas, teas, lemonades and other non-fine beverages is pretty damn ignorant.

Men’s Health called Sierra Nevada’s Bigfoot “the undisputed beast of the beer jungle.” And why? Because it contains just about twice the amount of calories as most mass-produced yellow fizzy beers. They also admit that most of the calories come from its hefty 9.5% alcohol by volume content. Well, DUH. Big foot is a Barleywine. The style itself dictates a high malt content, high alcohol level, big bold, rich and flavorful beer.

Most consumers of fine beverages are not looking to drink flavorless, low quality, mass-produced products. We demand quality. We demand flavor. We will not settle for sub-par beverages.

Sure, you could consume a yellow fizzy corporate beer for less calories. But let’s be honest, anyone who is drinking mass-produced swill produced from adjunct ingredients is not drinking it for its taste. They are drinking it for the alcoholic side-effetcts (aka to get buzzed or drunk). And when it comes down to it, when it comes to total calories consumed in relation to alcohol content, there is no significant difference between drinking an adjunct lager and a barleywine. If you really want me to break it down, let us look at the numbers.

Bigfoot 12 oz. = 330 calories + 9.5% alcohol

Budweiser 12 oz. = 145 calories + 5% alcohol

In order to get the same buzz from Bigfoot, one must consume two of bottles Budweiser. Which essentially puts both drinking experiences around 300 calories — give or take 40 (and if you are worried about consuming 40 extra calories, you have issues to worry about).

Now say, you aren’t looking for the buzz. Well, for the same amount of calories in a bottle of yellow fizzy lager, you could consume half a bottle of Bigfoot. It’s called portion control. You can either consume a lot of (what I argue to be the unhealthy option) an adjunct beer made with sub-par ingredients, or you can consume a smaller amount of a craft beer made with pure ingredients. Quality over quantity, folks. What a novel concept.

And as for Men’sHealth, next time you want to make such outlandish claims and attack the craft beer industry, do some freaking research. In no parallel universe does a craft beer produced with natural ingredients and natural sugars even come close to being as unhealthy as artificial sodas made in a laboratory with chemicals or fatty milkshakes with 2,000 calories.

Viva La Beer Revolution! Cheers!

WARNING: The nature of this post is extremely subjective and controversial.

It happens all the time. Celebrities, corporate tycoons and big brands are constantly trying to put their names on EV-ER-Y-THING. If something is hot, trendy and selling like hotcakes — then you can expect many dark horses in the shadows just waiting to take a share of the market.

It is after all, the capitalist way. Smart investors and savvy business professionals are always ahead of the curve when it comes to emerging market trends.

In my opinion, this can be both good and evil.

Good is when angel investors help to get small businesses off the ground. Good is investing in a talented and passionate craft brewer who wants to open his own brewery, but does not have the capital. Good is investing in the rapidly growing craft beer industry by supporting the development of privately owned, genuine craft breweries devoted to producing high-quality craft beers with extreme care. Good is supporting the little guy — the artist dedicated to the craft of beer.

Evil is when people take advantage of market trends and arrogantly infiltrate an industry for which they obviously have no respect or true passion. Evil is vanity. And normally, the vanity and arrogance of celebrities and big brands does not affect me. Usually, I choose to ignore it. BUT when these big brand tycoons try to infiltrate and bastardize the craft beer industry, it becomes personal.

Sure there are genuine celebrities and big business folks who are actually passionate about the beverage industry and have done great things for it (i.e.: Paul Newman wines). I understand that not everyone has evil intentions. And sometimes, the marketing can be so good that it is hard to see the truth through all the bells and whistles.

Clever marketers pull the wool over peoples eyes and make them believe what they want they want them to believe. Corporate brewing companies are constantly trying to convince people with creative marketing ploys that they actually care about the art of brewing beer — all while producing low quality beers using adjunct ingredients. (i.e.: Miller’s ridiculous “Triple Hops Brewed” campaign) Clever consumers, however, can usually see through the all the bullshit.

At least these guys TRY to put out a good front.

And then, there are the arrogant marketers. These are the people who think that their brand is immortal — that they are golden and untouchable. Arrogant marketing is self-branding anything and everything as a result of one’s own vanity. Arrogant brands think that they have the Midas touch — anything they put their name on will turn to gold.

And that makes me sick.

Arrogant is saying–>

“Once in every generation a brand comes along that simply defies convention. This generation’s brand is Ed Hardy. With a cult of customers that is the envy of any brand, a fanatical celebrity following, and a worldwide marketing machine that spans more than 40 countries.

From the golden touch of Christian Audigier and the magical brush stroke of Don Ed Hardy, the Godfather of the modern tattoo.

The time has come for Ed Hardy beer. No rules. No expectations. No limitations.”

Really? I mean REALLY? Is this some sort of sick joke?

Listen, I love beer. Beer is essentially my life (aside from Ohio State football). And I’m always excited to learn about new breweries and new beers. But this, this really irritates me.

As far as I can tell, Christian Audigier could care less about beer — and I have yet to find anything to prove otherwise. All he seems to care about is putting his label on anything and everything possible. According to the website, Ed Hardy has a “Light and a Premium” beer in its line. But there is no mention of style, brewing techniques, ingredients or the actual “brewery” which produces it.

Ed Hardy beer is NOT about the beer, its about the name and the brand. MARKETING FAIL.

In my not-so-humble opinion, the last thing the beer industry needs is another corporate tycoon producing sub-par, adjunct beers and brainwashing the mass public with ridiculous marketing campaigns.

Maybe I’m just uber sensitive. Maybe I’m too much of a purist. Maybe my passion for the craft beer industry has clouded my judgement. Maybe this is actually a good thing for the craft beer industry. Maybe celebrity interest in beer will help boost the industry as a whole.

Or maybe I’m right. Maybe this sucks.

What do YOU think?

It is time to leave the dark side of corporate beer.

Listen, I understand [more than most] that the economy sucks.

Like most of the world, I cannot afford to squander my money. Heck, I don’t get a paycheck. My income is solely based on tips. I live week to week … if not day to day.

I find myself struggling to afford the luxuries I used to take for granted when the economy was stronger [and my income was more stable].

Anyone who has ever visited my “man cave” can attest that The Wench lives a very “modest” lifestyle. True story: I do not have any furniture of my own. The only electronic devices I own are a laptop, iPhone, iPod and digital camera. I own ONE piece of REAL jewelry … my gold class ring from The Ohio State University. I don’t have a collection of designer handbags or shoes.

I do have designer eyeglasses, however. I rationalize having them because they are an essential part of my “brand.”

Obviously, I am not materialistic. Even if I had the money, I highly doubt that I would make superficial and superfluous purchases. It is not in my blood.

Although I have cut back tremendously on spending my hard-earned money, I have not stopped entirely. Most of my money is spent on the “finer things in life.”

Food. Wine. Beer. Travel.

Without these key components, my life would cease to exist.

And even though I am on a tight budget, I ABSOLUTELY REFUSE to spend my money on cheap, mass-produced, super low quality beer. I work hard for my money. And I will not waste it on worthless products.

Why not?

• I try not to support corporations that contribute to globalization and and world poverty.
• To me, quality is more important than quantity.
• I value my palate. And respect  my body. I will not subject my taste buds to bad beer.
• I believe in supporting the “small guy.” I want my dollar to matter. Corporate breweries brew beer strictly for profit. Craft breweries brew beer in the name of love.

BOTTOM LINE: I am a beer brat. A beer geek. A beer connoisseur. And I hate corporate beer. I think it tastes like shit. It is uncreative, uninspiring … and flavorless. Period. End of story.

Yes, I am strongly opinated on this issue. I refuse to drink corporate, regardless of how inexpensive it is. The value is NOT there. It is not worth it.

I also realize that this post may rub some people the wrong way, which is fine. My target audience is not the everyday Bud drinker.

Sam Caglione makes a really strong arguement about market share in his book “Brewing Up A Business.” He was criticized for his off-centered style of beer making and told that he would never be able to compete with any of the big dogs. Sam’s response? He was not interested in stealing market share from the corporate breweries. As with my blog, Dogfish Head is not focused on appealing to corporate beer drinkers.

(The Beer Wench: An Off-centered Blog for Off-centered People) Sorry Dogfish Head, I just couldn’t resist.

Although I am not targeting my blog towards corporate beer drinkers, I am not opposed to “recruiting” people from the dark side. In my opinion, the biggest barrier to people drinking craft beers is lack of information and education about the industry. In this economy, people cannot afford to gamble on the unknown. They are afraid to take risks. Lack of confidence in choice usually results in the failure to make a choice (also known as choice paralyzation).

How does one break through the barrier of choice paralyzation? Through education! And the ultimate source of information is peers … and the ultimate tool for exchanging information with peers is Social Media.

Enter The Wench. I may not be a beer afficianado, but I am passionate about it. There is no monetary incentive for me to tell people to drink craft beer. And I will be the first person to admit when I do not like a certain beer – even if it’s made by one of my favorite breweries. TRUST is extremely important to me. I promise to always be honest with my readers, regardless of the repercussions.

My palate is not the end all be all. I can say with utmost confidence that a good number of people will not enjoy the styles of beer that I love the most.  WHICH IS FINE, because I am not going to make people like the beers that I like. HOWEVER, I will do my best to help people find a [craft] beer that they will like.

I love playing beer Yenta.

Let The Wench help you find your perfect beer.

Please put down the Budweiser. Cheers!